With You

  Once upon a time, there live a simple minded boy. He like to play computer games and sports but always sleeps in class. Well, he is not popular in school and usually likes being alone in a corner reading his fantasy novels. One day, he get to know a girl while playing some online games. They chatted and become very good friends. At the end of the day, they exchange phone numbers and stared text-ing each other everyday. 

  Apparently, He falls in love with her and they started dating but there was only one matter that stands between them... Distance... They lived very far away from each others but still they were a very loving couple. He would call her every night and day just to hear her voice. She would want to talk to him untill she fell asleep and everyday he would wake up before her and give her a wake up call just to get her ready for classes. He would say "I will be your guardian angel."

  Months passed, and they have seen each others only 2 times in all these months. He missed her even more each day. She needs him even more everyday but, he could not be there for her every time. She felt even more lonely as days passed. Distance is between them. She blamed him for not being able to be with her. He too blame him self for the same thing. Every night they would argue on the same matter, every night he would shed tears and punch the walls to blame him self. Untill one day...

  One fine day, she found someone else. Someone that could be there whenever she needed someone to lean on, someone that could be there to wipe off her tears, someone that could care and make her happy and she wouldn't felt lonely anymore. He found out but said nothing. in the day, he locks himself in his room and stare at the empty wall, at night he went out just to look at the stars and finally he made a choice. Something that might turn him into a bad person and also at the same time hurt him so deeply that he could almost die. He decided to let her go, to force her away, to be a bad person and said he do not need her anymore and wants her out of his life. He was thinking that someone would take good care of her and at least she would be happy.

  3 years had passed and one day... She broke up with someone, they had a very terrible fight, and she was very down, She did a lot of bad things to hurt her self, she was feeling so lonely that she just wish her life would end just like this when suddenly, her phone rang... It was him, the boy who fell in love with her 3 years ago. They had a great chat and she was feeling better. They missed each other very much. She told him she wished that he could be here with her now, and so he asked her to close her eyes, switch off her room light, turn around and slowly open her eyes. He was standing by her window smiling at her with arms wide open. She couldn't control her tears, she ran towards him and just fall into his arms. They Held each other in a way that says "I missed you more than anything".
"Why are you here?" she ask...
"Lets just say it was a miracle"  he answered...
and as old times, he accompany her untill she fall asleep but this time he was by her side. He was gone when she woke up but he left a note by her side.
"Whenever you need me, I would always be by your side."

  Each time she was sad or needed someone on that very night, He would call her on her cell and say "close your eyes, turn off your room lights, turn around and slowly open your eyes..." and there he was always with her. Always there for her but...
(as i always said, nothing is perfect and there will always be a but...)

  But... one day, he stops appearing. He no longer text or call her. She could not get in touch with him. The number he used to call her was no longer available. That was when the service center told her that the number was not in used for more than 3 years. She was shocked and couldn't find any answers to her questions. 

  On that very night when she was about to fall asleep, she notice there was a letter stuck beside her bed and so she open it. There was an old cut out news paper from 3 years ago saying that boy died in a car accident they day he broke up with her, and there was also a letter in his own writing... as she read it, tears began to flow...

  "I'm very sorry I could not appear by your side any more. By now you should have know that I am no longer alive. Do you remember that i used to say i will be your guardian angel? Well, I did that, but as an angel, we would have to go back on top and i could not bear to leave you here... so I did the one thing that no angel would dare to do. I Clipped off my wings to stay with you forever. Without my wings i have no powers, I could not appear for you to see me but I will always be by your side. If you meet a wall in live, I would break it for you. If you were to drown in life, I would safe you. If you were left in the dark, I would light up the way for you. You could not see me but I will always be with you. I would always be your guardian angel...
I love you... and will forever love you..."

Lost

I am standing on a crossroad,
Each road leading to a place that i don't know,
And i don't know which should i take,
Or should i just stay here,
I do not know whats left here that keeps me from staying anymore,
Besides my family, my friends, and the beautiful night skies,
There is nothing left for me here,
I wonder if people would even miss me when i leave,
I wonder how they would feel with me gone,
I wonder if there is someone who would say "I wish i had stop him from going or at least i'll go with him.",
But the world is never kind,
Never fair,
Never perfect for anyone,
There is always a catch in everything,
A price we all have to pay for the things we gain,
Nothing is free,
Not even Love, because you pay with Hurts,
Not even Sweetness, because you pay with Bitterness,
Not even Hate, because you pay with Betrayal and Lies,
Not even Happiness, because you pay with sadness,
Not even Companionship, because you pay with Loneliness,
Not even Fulfillment, because you pay with Emptiness,
And don't think that you have gain what you got because there is a price and it can also backfire at you,
I'm still standing at the crossroad,
I really do not know what I really want,
Maybe you are right that I never really let it all go,
Maybe this is why it still hurts,
And maybe that is why i still felt alone empty fallen break,
sometimes I just wish I could rip my heart out and wash it clean then maybe i could feel different and maybe i could really see what i really want,
I know, I emo, down, useless piece of shit or whatever you called it.
standing on a crossroad and don't know which to pick,
I'm Lost In Life...